The Diatribe is Back Baby…

After many, many months in a self-imposed exile, our long national nightmare is over.

THE STEVE O DIATRIBE IS BACK…
WITH A VENGEANCE

As usual, we jump into the deep end with absolutely, positively no format, rhyme, reason or any other semblance of mental acumen…

Let’s start with our boys in pinstripes….

ONE ADAM TWELVE…
What former Phillie said the following?

“This is a new year. That’s last year, and if you guys want to talk about last year, I also won a World Series … but that’s not here nor there.”

A) Pat Burrell
B) So Taguchi
C) Adam Eaton

Yes kids, you guessed it, the one and only (thank God) Adam Beaten, er Eaton, uttered this delusional thought aloud a few weeks back. Now, I do not know what, if any, prescription medication he is currently taking but whatever it is, I would advise him to double or triple the dosage.

I also won a World Series…”

How do you say that without either being a complete jerk, a complete idiot or both?

Adam Eaton has as much to do with the Phils winning the World Series as you and did. In fact, we as fans had MORE to do with the Phils winning than he did! We at least supported our team.

Now, for kicks and giggles, let’s go 20 or 30 years into the future. We see Adam Eaton in his home, speaking to his grandchildren.

Little 8 year old Jimmy looks up and asks excitedly:
“Grandpop, can you tell us about the time you won the World Series??!!!”

“Well kids, it was really something. I don’t like to brag, but I had quite a bit to do with the Phillies winning the World Series.”

“But grandpop, how come you weren’t on the post-season roster? How come you didn’t ride in the parade? How come you had a 4-8 record and a 5.80 ERA? Furthermore grandpop, if you really are our grandpop, how come opponents batted .310 against you, had a .318 On Base Percentage and a Slugging Percentage of .487??!!!”

“Well Jimmy… hey you know what, who’s up for ice cream??!!”

DON’T BRETT ON IT…
Isn’t it an unwritten code or maxim that in sports when a player is in his “walk year” AKA the last year of his contract, said player performs with a sense of urgency, you know, kind of ramps it a notch or two hoping to get as many zeroes added to his new contract as possible?

Enter Brett Myers. This is the last year of Brett’s contract. And how has Brett “ramped it up” so far?

Including last night’s game, he has a record of 2-2, an ERA of 5.35, he’s allowed 43 hits, 15 walks and 10 home runs in just 37 innings. Opponents are hitting .293 against him and have a mind blowing .578 Slugging Percentage.

As Jody Mac says… OUCH.

I think it’s time for Brett’s agent to have a little heart-to-heart with his client, don’t you?

I mean who does he think he is… Adam Eaton?

DILEO IS NO DE-LION…
It’s now been, what a few weeks since the Sixers played their last game? Whatever the date it was, the shock and awe of their performance has not waned one bit, at least for me.

That my friends was a travesty of epic proportions. Every fan in attendance that night should be given a full refund and a personal apology from Ed Snider. Course Ed may be a little too busy apologizing to all the Flyers fans but…

Obviously Tony DiLeo cannot return next season in his current role. Put him back to whatever role he had prior (head ball washer, I don’t know what his title was, doesn’t matter.) I’m sure Tony DiLeo is a very nice man. But so is my mailman and I don’t want him coaching the Sixers, either.

As for the players… I would definitely keep… plus I would not let go of…

See what I did there?

Aside from Eliot Ness, ain’t none of ’em untouchable. Like items in a flea market, put the players out with a sign that reads “All offers considered.”

REID IT AND WEEP…
Actually, I do not come to bury Andy, Joe, et al but to praise them. And if you know me, that’s not easy for me to say, er write…

But I think what the Eagles did re: the Draft/Off Season to date has been for the most part pleasantly surprising.

Think about it…

How many times under this current administration, have they 1) acknowledged needs and 2) then went out and did something about them?

But that’s precisely what they did in adding two proven players to their offensive line, signing a much-needed fullback and addressing their need at WR and RB and possibly TE, depending on how Cornelius Ingram does in the OTA, Training Camp, etc.

Of course their off season ALSO included the Brian Dawkins debacle and disgrace and I will surely not leave them off the hook for that, but…

Overall, I would have to say the Eagles Front Office would receive a grade of B- from me if I were to grade their entire off season

Ok, that’s all I got for today.

Til next time.


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